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Thursday, May 19th, 2005
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3:24 pm - im bored
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well, ive done all im supposed to today, and now im just not necessarily wasting space... but kinda. i mean.. yeah. eh, ill get over it. its pretty damn good being me lately.
current mood: complacent current music: D'Artagnan's Theme // The Clarence Greenwood Recordings by Citizen Cope
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| Tuesday, April 5th, 2005
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3:13 am
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| Tuesday, January 18th, 2005
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5:00 pm
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I got an iPod mother fuckers!!!!!!
and heres some songs you should download maybe, or at least ive been listening to them without pause for working on 11 hours now.
tegan and sara - where does the good go (or anything really) the faint couches in alleys - styrofoam ft ben gibbard, or anything by just styrofoam is good too anything by the stills big audio dynamite - rush jay z and linkin park - faint, but who didnt know that already? garbage v2.0 has been really good lately... reminds me of fifth grade though pitbulls cuban rideout - lil jon and the eastside boys ben folds five - army has been in my head all week brandon benson - im easy, oh and life in the d by him too
and robbie williams is the shit
" Oh it seemed forever stopped today All the lonely hearts in London Caught a plane and flew away And all the best women are married All the handsome men are gay You feel deprived
Oh what are you really looking for? Another partner in your life to abuse and to adore? Is it lovey dovey stuff, Or do you need a bit of rough? Get on your knees
I spy with my little eye Something beginning with... Got my back up And now she's screaming So I've got to turn the track up Sit back and watch the royalties stack up I know this girl she likes to switch teams And I'm a feind but I'm living for a love supreme
When there's no love in town This new century keeps bringing you down All the places you have been Trying to find a love supreme A love supreme
Don't let it get you down Everybody lives for love " --supreme
current mood: flirty current music: howie day - end of our days (aww...)
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4:45 pm
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| Monday, January 10th, 2005
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7:28 pm - a lesson in growing up
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heres an idea for myself and others-
dont make someone your priority if youre just one of their options.
esp if youre the shit and just dont have to settle for someone not worth it like that.
also esp if youre a stupid spoiled bitch.
also also esp if its just cause you dont think youll survive another waking moment without having someone need you, so you just jump through your mental address book of people who could maybe fill the shoes of what youre looking for instead of taking time and doing it right.
cause having someone want you is your only validation that you arent, in fact, a waste of time.
but you are in fact a waste of time, because the whole thing, them needing you, isnt about them at all, its just about you and your insecurities.
cause its always all about you. youre the star. everyone else is just supposed to hope for a supporting role.
and even though you like acting, you have no ability to live for even one second in anyone elses shoes.
nor do you have the ability to appreciate what you already have, cause theres this void, you see, that wont be filled by anything other than a change in attitude, but you seem to think that theres something out there that you need to find, and it can magically fix your emptiness, but youre wrong.
so you go around and make your stupid mistakes left and right that are probably going to haunt you for the rest of your life just cause youre too damn immature to wake the fuck up and pay attention to who you are and what you do, and those that actually care about you are just in awe of your lack of respect for them, and soon wont have any for you themselves.
or maybe im just angry ;)
or maybe im just jealous (double ;) )
grow up.
ciao.
current mood: disappointed
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| Sunday, January 9th, 2005
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2:21 am - why am i updating
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livejournals "sticky". thats right, sticky. cause you look at it for half a second and youre lured in again... but all it does is start drama and get you in trouble, or bore you to death after a week. but then i think of those people, those lj addicts, whove been doing it forever and love it... theyre weird. im friends with a lot of them. theyre weird. ill start talking to them again just cause theyll see me on their friends thing where you can view all the recent entries of everyone at once... yeah... that thing... thatll get em.
god i love my friends. every day is so much better with the people i know being a part of it. i dont know where or what id be without them.
anyhoos... lets talk philosophy. its so late i dont even know if i spelled that right. when i was 10 i would have made like world champion cause i was the spelling shit, but this kid tricked me and said that muscle was spelled mussel, which is true, but thats the mollusk kind, not the human tissue kind... and i got all flustered and ruined my future as a spellologist. fuck that kid. i forgot who he was though. fuck my memory
*ding, marijuana affects your memory."
anyways again... philosophy, yeah.
my life is like a hologram. i can turn it one way and its fuckin awesome and i rule the school and own your ass. im the shit and better than sliced bread. and i am, so its the right way to turn it, but if i let it slip to the left a little, im an instant existentialist. "wow, theres just no point to the world", i say. "fuck all these idiots ive devoted myself to. they dont do the same for me, and they shouldnt", i say. not in regards to anyone in particular, but lets take one step back.
why isnt jordan in another country right now or another college, or doing something crazy? cause hes afraid? maybe, but its also cause he values his relationships too much. money and exploration and travel are friggin sweet, but long term close friends are better. jordan would do anything for anyone he values really, and holds on to people perhaps too much cause he holds no value to anything himself. his life has always been that if a tree falls but nobody hears it, it doesnt happen, so nothing is important to him unless its important to someone else. thats why jordans such a suckah. damn the man who made jordan this way. lately, money isnt even such a priority to him, cause...
sorry, first person time.
where am i going? what am i doing with my life? what do i want to look back and say i did or didnt do? how do i want my life to look 10 15 20 years from now?
OH WAIT... EVERYONE ASKS THAT. THATS LIKE EVERYONES PROBLEM AT THIS AGE.
ha, and i thought i was original.
maybe people should stop being so self involved that they dont realize things are only what they seem theyre amazing if theyd only chill the fuck out and live like it other people have feelings, and this isnt the truman show AT ALL things arent always replaceable and everything is what the fuck you make of it everythings just fine.
god i love my clarity.
also, blockbuster doesnt have late fees anymore. that means theyre so desperate for money that theyre removing their most important money maker just so they can have the business. i dont ever want to be like that. either you turn your movies in on time or you suffer the damn consequences. this shit doesnt revolve around you, im running a fucking business and you gotta get your shit together or pay the damn fees. thats not too much to ask or goddamn ridiculous at all, you asking for so much freedom is. quit waiving your family video card around here talkin bout guns like i aint got none, what you think i sold em all?
i wasnt talking about blockbuster, but i mean, thats cool- no late fees, right?
too much metaphorical discussion with myself for one night. its internet research, porn, and bedtime.
night kids, and maybe ill write tomorrow, but i wouldnt bank on it.
current mood: quixotic current music: the stills - love and death
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| Wednesday, June 30th, 2004
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3:49 am
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uh... havent updated in a while. dans here. we couldnt find people to hang out with so we stole watermelons and ate them at a school playground and listened to music from my new car stereo while swinging and having a cigarette.... all in all, id say it was a pretty good evening.
and now, goodnight.
current mood: accomplished
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| Tuesday, May 25th, 2004
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4:27 am - with 2200 songs, its hard to just go on the computer and pick one
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so sup bitches?
i havent written in a while.
when i have absolutely nothing to do, as in, already fuckin went to freep.com and searched the classifieds for dogs for sale and cars i wont buy and guitars i cant play, and after ive seen all the porn my.. er... i can handle, and after ive researched all the new cell phones out, and i cant sleep cause im not tired enough, and bla bla bla, i come here and check up on peoples livejournals
so here i am.
i was reading and responding, and i figured, ill write something.
so whats new with me? um... too complicated/lengthy.
so what did i do today? ok, thats cool, i can answer that. got up at 2, stretched, ate some food, watched tv in my underwear for a good 3 hours, put clothes on to go to dinner, went to dinner, ate dinner, cleaned up after dinner, got in the car again, drove to dairy queen, had dairy queen, saw shrek 2 (funny, good, puss in boots is my new favorite... er.. animated thing), smoked, went home.
amazing, huh?
tomorrow i get my car though. im excited because i hate being stuck home, and i hate having people drive me places, and i hate not having my car. im naked without my car. my life is damn near meaningless without my car. the world is a cold cruel place without my car.
what would a day with my car look like you ask? got up at 11, worked out, showered, went to my job (which i currently dont have, cause i dont have a car), came home, changed, went out, smoked in my car, went to friends house, drank, chatted it up with an awesomely hot girl with huge boobs, had amazing sex with A DIFFERENT, YET EQUALLY HOT OR HOTTER GIRL (cause with a car, i could visit with that many hot and interesting people you see), drove home and listened to great music very loudly and sang along still happy from the great sex i just had, parked car in garage, got out of car, came in house at 5 exhausted from a night of driving and friends and sex and drugs and alcohol, passed out on my comfortable bed, and woke up the next day to do it all over again.
SEE THE DIFFERENCE???
why am i typing?
goodnight.
current mood: irritated current music: death of an interior decorator - death cab for cutie
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| Tuesday, April 20th, 2004
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12:04 am - covering smells with smells
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im in my chair in my dorm room in my dorm in college. im wearing a wife beater and sweatpants. i just realized that this will be the third time i use deodorant since my last shower. this is wrong, i know, but im trying to help myself.
i guess im just excited...
wait, wtf, no, continuing on that line of thought would be like some third grader explaining why they sneeze when theyre nervous.
i am not nervous, or not really anyways, but i am excited. it has nothign to do with not showering, i just was supposed to go swimming today, and that fell through and i have no reason to shower because, well, the only person here is me.
so fuck you guys.
but as i was saying...
saturday will be my sisters bat mitzvah. its a big deal. 300 some people and i made the montage (for non jews thats the video with the pictures). i actually made two, ones a surprise.... its a big fuckin deal. i got so stupid today i even called the dj to make sure he had a pause button so the dvd could start right away without going through the menus.
ok so what else.... my clothes came in. we had our clothes made for the party cause its a pajama party and my mom and sister are fat and i want fuckin clothes made for me, so we did. mines a replica of something hugh hefner wore to the oscars a long time ago... reading that i cant tell if it sounds gay... i said replica, yes, and i Am having clothes made for me, yes, but i mean, hugh hefner, playboy, tatas... doesnt that redeem me?
anyways, thats about it i guess, but it feels insane. i mean, thisll be the biggest party ill have until probably my wedding... thats crazy.
so... i think thats it. im bored... i think ill sleep or something... not tired... sleeping pills? maybe.
oh and ***ne s***p**s has naked pictures up on the net now. and so does whitney dore. i guess all the girls we made fun of for being sluts in high school turned out to really be, well, sluts... crazy.
caio
current mood: enthralled current music: toms diner, cause its been a while
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| Monday, March 29th, 2004
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4:45 am - to be young
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so its like 445, and this will be yet another night i go without sleeping. i didnt sleep thurs night for no reason, slept 4 hours yesterday night, and now tonight no sleep. im also sick. why am i telling you this? because it makes me the pimp shit, thats why. also, i have my car here at school now, and im going to figure out some sneaky ass way to not get a ticket and park somewhere close to my dorm... and i will.
i hate having a cold because i feel disconnected or something. its hard to explain, its the same thing for me with glasses. when im wearing glasses i feel clumsy and out of place or some shit, and i usually hurt myself on something, or say random stupid shit, and yes, there IS a connection damnit. so when i have a cold i feel like every time i talk im like sending it through a fucked up translator or something, and i feel like i hear things differently, and wtf with people asking about if i smell whatever the fuck like 20 times today...
ok, so sucks that you had to read that because thats some boring ass shit.
tomorrow is a midterm at 8, swimming, a class at 1240, a nap like fuck, and a midterm review for another class at 830.
the day after is a midterm at 3 and getting blown off my ass or drinking until puking at 5.
lifes a blur.
i need more entertainment, im like an entertainment heavy day tampon, i keep soaking up the fun, and i still feel dry.
current mood: drained current music: under the milky way - church
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| Friday, March 26th, 2004
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8:41 am
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whoa
fantahsay.... go to that crazy bitches lj. i mean, whoa. you want a fucked up read when youre bored/becoming an insomniac... fantahsay is it. thats all i have to say about that. shes so fucked up im afraid to put her on my friends list so i can read her crazy shit everyday without going to her page especially.
whoa
current mood: amused current music: forever young - alphaville, dl it, think after prom maybe
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4:28 am - we meet again
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so whats up bitches? long time no talk to. howve ya'll been? im coming home this weekend, so id like to see at least one of you fuckers tomorrow. also, i notice my picture is aaron cummins with a gun... thats... interesting. is he dead? what happened to him?
so anyways, lately i cant sleep. its 430, and i think im just gonna skip it. ill get breakfast maybe at like 7... i dunno, its fucked up. maybe ill go swimming at 6... also, i smoke too many cigarettes. what else is new with me... lets see... i dunno... lets just list the fucked up shit i need to take care of soon, shall we? i mean, i dunno... why not?
smoke too much (see above) dont do any school shit, going to fail, need to do school shit drink a lot need to keep working out and shit dont have a good sleeping pattern .... ...
.......whoa, wait a minute, i dont have that much shit wrong with me! i RULE! well never fucking mind then! i mean, i dunno, theres stupid shit i didnt list like my car is ready to die, or... wait, ran outta other stuff too.. no, wait, i dont htink i have enough friends that are close as in here and shit enough to occupy all my time, and.... nope thats it again. well fuck it, i guess i got it pretty damn good.
alright then suckers, catch ya later, hopefully with something more interesting.
current mood: complacent current music: some "brand new" shit, i think seventy times 7...
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12:42 am
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julie fried wrote that so that i had to start writing in this again..... guess im back? yeah, so uh, today was fun...
ill work on thinking up creative things for you people.
for now, time to drink.
current mood: curious
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12:38 am
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today was really hard for me. i finally let go of danielle my little girl. her pussy smells anyways... but still.. i liked the taste of it cuz im disgusting and jewish. and because im jewish i have a small penis and lots of hair.. so the only pleasure i get is from looking at pussies and wishing i had one of my own or a penis large enough to penetrate a real vagina instead of the one i make with my hand. oh danielle, shes such a gockba. i hope she burns in the hells of dorm mayo. ok i have to go because it is time to trim my penis hairs so it wont burn anymore when i pee.
current mood: thirsty current music: dirty pop
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| Thursday, February 13th, 2003
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4:45 pm - lets do it like they do on the discovery channel
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can we, please? come on. come on.... please?? ill pay you.
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| Tuesday, February 11th, 2003
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3:02 pm - who'll read this one?
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jesus. thats so raven. i stayed home all day and slept and ate and downloaded music then listened to it backwards and heard crazy shit like i love satan. so that was cool. otherwise, apparently shit went down today at school. reminded me i had this, so i got bored and now im writing in it. whoo.
current mood: blah current music: missy - pussycat (!?#?@??$!?#?>$?) crazy song
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| Thursday, January 16th, 2003
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11:26 pm - goodnight mom love you
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mom: dogs had his pills.
jordan: ill fucking kill you
mom: what?
jordan: ill cut a deal with you
mom: what? thats not what you said.
jordan: yes it is
mom: you dumbass.
jordan: what?
mom: thats obviously not what you said, you said ill fucking kill you
jordan: youll fucking kill me? what? why? whatd i do?
mom: nothing dumbass. nothing.
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| Monday, November 4th, 2002
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11:55 am - from the newspaper room--
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cats dating ben again. i dont really want her all that much, but still, i mean, come on. wtf. ive met dishrags id recommend for fucking before id even mention him. whatever. another one bites the dust, and another one gone another one gone, another one bites the dust. hey, *something something something*, another one bites the dust, yeah.
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11:55 am
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| Saturday, October 26th, 2002
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1:45 am
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sometimes i get bored and lonely. its usually after a mediocre night when i get home earlier than i have to, and it sucks. sad songs are nice though. i find myself listening to depressing music and looking at cars ill never buy. its a pathetic way to spend my time, and im tired now, but i cant sleep yet. i need something to consume me. no, i have shit, but its all beginning to bore me. maybe just a change in scenery. maybe just a really fun night. tomorrow?
current mood: discontent
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